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3 Linux Distros That You Might Never Want to Try

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Linux-based distributions like Fedora, Ubuntu, and openSUSE have completely revolutionized the traditional desktop. However, there are some distributions that don't quite match the standards that these Distrowatch-toppers have set. Here's a look at 3 such Linux distributions, that you'll never want to try.


Hannah Montana Linux:

-Hannah Montana: an American T.V series about a teenage girl leading a double life. She's an average schoolgirl by day and a famous pop star by night.

-Linux: a generic term referring to Unix-like graphical user interface (GUI) based computer operating systems based on the Linux kernel.


Now, in a rare and historic event, these two worlds have come together to bring a new era of hope in the world of desktop computing. Ladies and Gentlemen, presenting the revolutionary Operating System - Hannah Montana Linux (HML).

Boy in the crowd: What's Hannah Montana Linux?
The Steve Jobs of Linux: Hannah Montana Linux is a UNIX-like Linux Operating System based on Kubuntu.
Girl in the crowd: What is Linux?
Nose-picking tall-boy in crowd: What's UNIX?
Fat boy with an ice cream: What's Kubuntu? Is it a new toy or a cool gadget?
Miley Cyrus (yeah she's here!): What's an Operating System? Wait… what am I doing here? Isn't this Shaun's party? Duh!

In case you're wondering whether Hannah Montana Linux really exists, here's a link to their official website. HML is actually a KDE based Linux distribution with a 'really cool' Hannah Montana theme. According to the FAQ on the website, HML was designed to attract young users to Linux. Thank goodness, at least they'll do something more interesting to than going to Miley Cyrus concerts, watching Disney channel and having a sleepover party. Who knows, the next Richard Stallman might be a Hannah fan!

If ever your 10-year old inner self hasn't been sold yet, wait till you hear its official song. N.B: Considering some heart patients might be reading this article, I'm posting just the chorus of the song.

You get the best of both OS,s
Run Windows, take it slow
Then Linux rocks out the show
You get the best of both OS,s
Mix it all together and you know that it's the best of both OS,s
The best of both OS,s
You go to software premiers (is that Linus Torvalds?)

The whole song can be accessed HERE, proceed with caution though.

I wonder what's next for the Linux world - Ubuntu - Justin Bieber Edition. Biebuntu? Or maybe Rebbecca Black alarm calendar application?


Ubuntu Satanic Edition:

I have some questions. Do Satan worshipers really exist? If at all they do, then, whom do they worship? Bill Gates? Steve Jobs? Glenn Beck? Never mind, I was just plain curious. Moving on to the main topic, Ubuntu Satanic Edition (USE) is an Ubuntu-based Linux distribution focusing on the darker side of Linux. It was created in reaction to Ubuntu Christian Edition, and has since then, received a lot of criticism. The distribution has been banned from Distrowatch, and it's Wikipedia entry has also been deleted. Even though it tries to popularize Linux within a cult, the distro brings nothing special to the desktop other than some dark themes and CC-licensed heavy metal music. USE also has its own store that sells Satanic T-shirts and mugs.

ubuntusatanic.org

Compared to HML, they have a relatively shorter theme song:

“Woe to you, Oh Earth and Sea,
for the Devil sends the beast with wrath
because he knows the time is short…
Let him who hath understanding reckon
the distro of the beast,
for it is a Linux distro,
its distro is Ubuntu Satanic Edition.”


Religious Distros:

Ever since Linux has become popular among desktop users, a lot of religious, Linux-based distros have come up. The goal of these distros is either to make Linux appealing to religious people or make religion appealing to Linux users. Whatever their goal maybe, making a religion-based Linux distro doesn't make any sense whatsoever. This is because almost all the religious distros have the same features as the distributions from which they are derived. The only change they make is by adding or removing a few packages to make it appealing to the people of that religion. For example, Ubuntu Muslim Edition is nothing but Ubuntu with 3-4 extra software, which could easily be installed using apt-get. One thing I don't understand is why is the need for a special religious distro when the plain distros are doing so well? Does the FOSS philosophy go against any Christian/Islamic values? However, Microsoft, on the other hand, breaks the “Thou shalt not steal” commandment every time it releases a new version of Windows.


Written by: MJA, a Slackware Linux user and TechSource fan

18 comments

  1. Ubuntu Muslim Edition was renamed "Sabily" a while ago. Their primary F/OSS contribution is WebStrict, a front-end to DansGuardian.

    Ubuntu Christian Edition isn't being actively worked on. Their primary F/OSS contribution was DansGuardian GUI which was one of the earliest front-ends for DG.

    While religious distros are targeted for specific markets, they're likely to get more attention in those markets due to their supporters and theme than generic distros.

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  2. As with most Ubuntu derivatives/spinoffs/alternate versions, the point of most religious distros is to:
    - Provide a center of gravity for the packaging and maintaining of certain domain-specific software
    - Showcase software that may not otherwise see the light of day
    - Provide something specifically appealing to a subgroup of people.

    Don't know about the others, but there ARE things in Ubuntu CE which aren't in the repos (parental controls, opensong, etc.)

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  3. How come there was no link to USE? You are not discriminating are you? You don't have to be Satanic to like USE, they have a kick@$$ dark theme:
    http://ubuntusatanic.org/

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  4. USE was banned from Distrowatch? I hope they banned all the religious distros then, otherwise it's kinda ridiculous. I could see banning something like Ubuntu Kiddy Porn Edition (not real...I hope), but Satan is just a made up character in some old book. I haven't tried USE but I do think the themes are nice, i'v always liked dark themes. The distro might be more widely accepted if they called it Ubuntu Metal Edition though (not that all metal is related to Satan, but you know).

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  5. Perhaps the title of, 2 ubuntu variants you might never want to try.

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  6. Downloaded and tried the Hannah Montana Linux. It ran like a champ. The theme colors were impressive, but the Hannah Montana wallpaper had to go. It reminded me of that new internet sensation song Friday by Rebecca Black. You hate the words but the tune or in this case the underling disto, was pretty good.

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  7. You missed Ichthux http://ichthux.com/

    No, I don't use it - I prefer Enlightenment with Gentoo.

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  8. This should probably done little bit more simplistic. There should be a meta package of muslim, christian, satanic etc and this meta package should install new software, update themes etc. This would be much simpler to maintain then releasing new distro.

    "...why is the need for a special religious distro..."
    And why is the need for other 300 distros (besides big ones like: Ubuntu, OpenSuse, Fedora, Debian, Arch, Slackware etc)? They just provide something that people need.

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  9. If someone makes a Cthuluntu, I will definitely try it.

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  10. Of course it would have to be a Xubuntu derivative:
    cthuluntu.miskatonic.edu

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  11. Ubuntu Christian edition did have some strong inducements. It came with parental controls pre-configured & scripts to install the popular e-sword software for windows under wine, both things that a lot of people would find hard.

    You have to be a keen bible student to fully understand how computers have revolutionised bible study. Instead of a pile of books I can change multiple bible versions and commentaries with a mouse click. I can look at the original Greek or Hebrew & get a dictionary definition of each word with a mouse hover. I can highlight a keyword & search multiple reference books.

    You might not like what we study, but surely you can understand how the computer age has revolutionised what we do, which is after all handling information.

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  12. Satanic edition actually has a decent theme.

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  13. I've been using electronic bible study media ever since I started using Linux, back in 2000. Either on line resources or Linux based software, like Bible-KJV, bibledit, bibletime and sword, all available in the Linux (and Ubuntu) repositories.

    It's very handy having biblical reference material on hand when debunking Christianity.

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  14. I agree with what jhansonxi and alan said.
    For Sabily, we give on our web site a manner to convert a standard ubuntu into sabily by installing needed packages simply, on the other hand we provide to newbies a turnkey solution..that's the aim of a such distribution: simplify the use of FOSS for a specific group of people (Muslims in our case) no matter if they are experts or newbies.

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  15. I never tested Ubuntusatanic much but my guess is that a hellish / satanic theme can also appeal peoples who like to play games such as Doom :)

    In general I would prefer a dark / gothic theme over any of Ubuntus default themes which always looked ugly to me.

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  16. "You might not like what we study, but surely you can understand how the computer age has revolutionised what we do, which is after all handling information."

    Absolutely, but the point is that a completely separate distro wasn't necessary to achieve that. What you are talking about are programs that can be easily added to any distro.

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  17. I don't think you made a point. Because a theme doesn't meet your standards doesn't make this software useless. It's free, don't ridicule them.

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  18. Hey! That's cool... Windows had a satanic edition too (or several, depending on your point of view). No, wait... I'm sorry, that was millennium edition, never mind...

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